Friends With The Ex

Dear Fearless Love,

Successful Relationships through Coaching with Jianny AdamoI am still friends with my ex, but my current boyfriend has an issue with this. We are just friends, but he feels uncomfortable about us still hanging out together. What am I obligated to do here? Do we break up or am I forced to give up the friendship even though we’ve known each other a very long time?

-Cindee

Dear Cindee,

I am assuming your ex is your ex-husband. It is said that a divorce is 20% legal and 80% emotional. In order to be emotionally available for your next relationship it is important to let go of emotional ties, dependencies and attachments of your past relationship. This is very hard to do as it requires complete mourning, aka death, of the relationship: What it was, what it wasn’t and what it will never be. If you feel that you have already gone through all the stages of grief: Denial/Isolation, Bargaining, Anger, Depression; Acceptance and now have reestablished a new relationship with your ex but it is getting in the way of your new love, you may want to consider which of these relationships is the most important. Do you want to hold on to the past relationship which is safe and predictable? Do you want to embrace a new relationship and its uncertainties? Examining your answers to these questions may help determine how to approach each of them. Ultimately, it is important for you to have clarity unto what it is you really want for yourself as well as making sure you are truly honoring the relationships you are in.

 

By | 2017-03-22T18:42:11+00:00 July 11th, 2014|Categories: Dating, Divorce, Single, Uncategorized|Tags: |0 Comments

About the Author:

Jianny Adamo, LMHC, founder of Fearless Love Counseling & Coaching supports singles & couples breaking through fears and limitations to create safe & intimate marriages and relationships. Video calls and phone consultations available. Download a FREE excerpt of her book - From Love Trauma To Fearless Love: 7 Tango Steps For Breaking Free From Narcissists and Predators

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From Love Trauma To Fearless Love

7 Tango Steps For Breaking Free
From Narcissists and Predators
By Jianny Adamo, LMHC, LPC

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